moment considering whether to buy
the lite or regular variety." Sara
Some people never seem motivated to participate,
but are just content to watch others do the work. They are called "Speck
Some people never do anything to help, but
are gifted at finding fault with the way others do the work. They are called
Some people are very bossy and like to tell
others what to do, but don't want to soil their own hands. They are called
Some people are always looking to cause problems
by asking others to agree with them. It is too hot or too cold, too sour
or too sweet. They are called "Agie Taters."
There are always those who say that they
will help, but somehow just never get around to doing the promised help.
They are called "Hezzie Taters."
Some people can put up a front and pretend
to be someone they are not. They are called "Emma
Then there are those who love others and
do what they say they will. They are always prepared to stop whatever they
are doing and lend a helping hand. They bring real sunshine into the lives
of others. They are called "Sweet Taters."
How many fiddle players
does it take to eat an opossum?
Two, one to eat it & one to watch for cars.
Overheard at Clay's...What do you call a
dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call him, he can't come.
Great opossum moments
in Literature..."During the next part of eternity, I wondered why
she loved the opossum. Why did she pour out her love on that disgusting,
low on the evolutionary tree relic of
another age? It sickened
and the old standby...Why did the chicken
cross the road? ...To teach the Opossum it could be done!
Why did the opossum
cross the road? ...To teach the squirrel that you don't have to zig-zag
Two vultures get on an airplane, each of
them carrying one dead possum
under each wing. The stewardess
looks at them and says, "I'm sorry,
gentleman, only one carrion allowed
What is the difference
between a Northern zoo and a Southern zoo?...The Northern zoo has signs
on the cages with the scientific and common names while the Southern zoo
just has the common name and recipes!
What is the difference between a Northern
fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?...The Northern fairy tale starts
out "Once upon a time..." and the Southern fairy tale starts out with
"You ain't gonna believe this crap..!"